Well, August was interesting, in that my parents thought it was cool to abandon me for 10 days so they could have a rip-roaring time in Maui (something about a "baby moon" in anticipation of my new brother?). I hung with Grandpa and Grandma Stegmaier for a few days, then moved on to Nono and Nona Dalton for the remainder of my abandonment vacation. Even though I had a great time without them, it was nice when they ultimately returned home.
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| I should have known something was up when my Daddy presented me with this fine Elmo doll just days before the Maui departure. |
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| My parents sent me pictures like this to assure me they were having a grand time in Maui. |
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| I sent them pictures like this to remind them of my existence. |
This past weekend, I decided to take the family to Big Bear for a quick getaway. While strolling through the downtown area, we came across what appeared to be your average husky. My Grandma and Grandpa Stegmaier have six huskies, all of which are at my beckoning command. After speaking with the husky's owner for a moment, we learned that this "husky" was in fact a full-blooded timber wolf that the owner had rescued as a six-week old abandoned pup. Now, if you're one of my lucky and faithful blog followers, you certainly know that I'm something of a renaissance mini-man. Naturally, I had to tame this wild beast, as The Dex exercises control over all aspects of nature (except for the whole pee pee in the potty thing -- work in progress).
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| Cute little husky puppy.... |
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| ....is actually a bloodthirsty killer! |
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| Now that I've tamed you, let's talk about this Lola the Kitty character I mentioned. Do you like Persian food? |
I had a blast feeding the ducks at Big Bear Lake. We took a loaf of bread and fed the ducks for almost two hours each day [emphasis added by my Daddy] and had a great time.
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| I wonder if they know Donald Duck.... |
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| Hey, this dude's sister knows a guy who goes to the same gym as Donald's mailman! |
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| Mommy, you're quacktastic. |
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| My Daddy looks so happy. This picture was taken just before "it" happened (see below). |
The lake was peaceful, the sun was shining, the birds were singing, a slight breeze cooled our backs, and the bread crumbs were flowing like wine. But then, suddenly, and without warning.....
.... the ducks turned on us! Within seconds they waddled into formation and had us surrounded. The situation was certainly grim, there was no way out and we were out of bread crumbs. Their vicious beaks longed for the taste of my blood (or the bread in my pocket, but that's neither here nor there). My Daddy was useless, curled up on the sand, sucking his thumb and crying for his mommy [Daddy's note: That is a ridiculous claim and not entirely true, as I was sucking on my pacifier].
Fortunately, I speak fluent Duck and
talked my way out of a potentially quacked up situation. Our duck dinner was delicious. [click on the highlighted text for mind blowing linguistics]
As you may recall, I've been hitting the pool hard this summer, working with my trainers at Waterbabies Swim School (hey, Michael Phelps had to start somewhere too!). A quintessential tool for learning to swim like a Dexter fish is to have the hippest goggles on the market.
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| Crab goggles are good for underwater exploration.... |
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| Found my swim teacher. |
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| Hellooooooo ladies. |
When you have a body like mine (let's get real, no one has a body like mine), there's no shame in showing it off for the masses (after all, it's what the people want), as demonstrated by this
extreme muscle flexing session for the ladies. [click on the highlighted text for a stud fest]
Phew, all that gnarly muscle flexing has me tired. Time for beauty sleep. Until next time, Dexter out...
